regret.

So much, have changed from last year.

you, are gone, and I can't help but feel a tiny pinch of regret everytime I think ofyou. regretting that, I did not treat you the way I should, or at least, always. regretting that, you're gone and nothing can bring you back. regretting that, I won't be able to drive you around when I rech seventeen, like how you used to sit in the car with me and him driving. regretting that, you won't be able to see me through PMR, and furthermore, college and university. regretting that, I hadn't got the ability to take you out for a grand dinner, to thank you for all that you've done for me. regretting that, I won't be able to show you my report cards anymore. not that I did, since I've always told you my marks. regretting that, I didn't massage your legs and back for you when you did it for me, when I'm tired. regretting that, I didn't spend enough quality time with you. regretting that, I didn't learn how to cook from you, or any recipes from you. regretting that, no matter how much I say now, won't bring you back. regretting that, I didn't bring you overseas. regretting that, I didn't talk to you when I had the time. regretting that, you won't be able to see who I would marry and the kids I might have. regretting that, you wouldn't see what I would become in the future. and really regretting that, I couldn't pay the debt of love from you. I guess I can't call it debt, -I can't show my gratitude.

but I know, as long as you're with Him, I feel at peace. still, I can't seem to accept, the fact that, you're really gone. even if it's already two months. I can't seem to digest it. when I say it, it's like speaking air.

maybe it's not a tiny pinch, rather, a whole tank of regrets.

I truly, miss you.